Fuel for the Fire

Haha! Did ya wonder if I fell off the face of the planet? Nah… and sort of yea…  But as I came to look for something I was working on near the end of 2013, I found this in the draft folder, and I was surprised by what I’d written back there near the end of May…

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Many are crying out for the Fire to fall  – The Fire of His Spirit.

Pentecost is on the way, again. How much do we want this outpouring we are crying out for?

Fire needs fuel to burn. No fuel – no fire.  Pretty simple.

What might this fuel be that is needed for this coming Fire? Certainly we do not want it to fall only to fizzle away…

Romans 12:2 – NKJV

Living Sacrifices to God
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
It occurred to me, that WE need to be laid out upon the altar. We need to be willing to lay everything down. The Fire will fall, that is not even in question. All that we are and have built will be tested in the Fire. That which was hay, wood and stubble will be no longer.
It will soon be revealed what is Holy, and what was not.
“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind” – this is an amazing concept. This is a beautiful thing. Both John the Baptist and Jesus went about preaching “repent for the Kingdom of God is at hand”. God does not want us to miss Him. God wants us in His Kingdom. He wants us to see Him, see how much He loves us. He wants us in His family – Jesus gave it all that we could be fully reconciled back to the Father. He holds nothing back from us. Are we willing to lay it all down, holding nothing back from Him.
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I did not realize that this has been sitting in my draft folder now for over a month. Oh and how little did I know what was coming my way, or how much of what is written here I’d be living out. I’ve been getting tested in some of that fire most recently, I think many of us have been. A visiting minister told me last weekend, that God wants a sacrifice. He’s willing to release the fire, but He requires a sacrifice. Guess I wasn’t so far off after all.  🙂
More to come, surely..
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Walking It Out

Wrote this Saturday evening.. very late. Too late to post.  But I’m going to leave it as it stands…

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I had decided early on with this blog, given the title, that I would do my best to be transparent and be real, even when things weren’t all awesome and amazing. Then this evening, I’ve been listening to a prophetic word, and part of it was telling others of your journey, including the processing, and not just the end tale of glory. Yes… we fail. Some days are just a bit tougher.

I’ve not really had much time for writing.. not even in my journal. It’s been a bit of a blessed whirlwind. I’ve already posted that I’ve gained a new son. That’s a positive! What I’m not sure I included, was that he’s also helping sort out, and route out some things from the past that have been buried or hidden, some I’m finding out, from a very long time ago.

It’s a process. Tonight it seems like a long process. There’s been this ebb and flow kind of thing with it for the last couple of months. Something is revealed, sometimes by confrontation, other’s by God just quietly pointing out a thought that needs to be captured and thrown down.

Tonight was a bit of a surprise.. actually there’s been a lot of those in the last couple of weeks. My son, who’s has the loving nickname of Doctor Bryan, had prescribed recently 20 hours of Graham Cooke teachings. Graham is good on identity stuff. I had gotten a couple off of Graham’s site a few days ago, that were available without cost.  I was listening to one of those.. pretty much for hours off and on. I wasn’t prepared for the ensuing encounters.

About midway in this audio, there’s a declaration made – the whole audio actually was a prophetic word or prayer. I’ve listened to this section no less than 15 times.. but I think it was more. Everytime I listen to it, I’m stunned. For just about a minute or two, the voice is different. It’s not Graham’s voice. But it’s a voice I know, a voice I’m intimately acquainted with. This is a voice I’ve been desperate to hear again. It is even the voice I trust above all others. It’s this last piece that’s doing me in.

I didn’t know the wells of pain in one’s soul could possibly run so deep. Actually, they started opening up last weekend. I knew it wasn’t done then, and to be honest, I don’t think it’s done now either. But I know this – the voice is God’s. And as I’m hearing Him say “I Will Win” 3 times over, and I’m recognizing His Voice, declaring, assuring, making His point, the tears flowed and the real crying lets loose. Wow, I can hardly believe I’m writing this for people to read.

I’ve had experiences with profound grief, and am now well acquainted with the rending of one’s heart – hurts like nothing else. This was sort of the same but different. Years of pain, and fear and many many prayers prayed started forcing their way out. I couldn’t see the road anymore even. When I got home.. I just let go and let it rip, sitting in the driveway, pretty much unable to move.

It’s been a long wait, most likely, longer than I was aware of. But that’s enough for now..

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Note: in the midst of the process, there’s also restoring and rebuilding going on!!! Will get to that in a later post..

Overtaken by Adoption

I think Pappa’s teaching me about the Spirit of Adoption. I loved my first son sooo incredibly much, I couldn’t even fathom how I could possibly love the one on the way too. Then we had two more too. And I found that one’s heart could be expanded, far greater than one could think possible. Now I have as many spiritual sons & daughters as natural. And I love them all. But I’m finding out today, that there’s an adoption – though not legal – that’s been taking place with a couple of them… as if they need more than just time, and counsel and the like… needing to be loved as if they were your own the whole time. And I’m finding out that I’m quite capable of doing that, that the love well does actually run deep enough, and my heart can expand wide enough to enfold the more. I can’t recall all the times over the years in situations, ‘God I need your heart! My heart’s not big enough, my love is not strong enough’. His Love is without limitation or restriction; He is Love. And we can love the more without taking a single drop away from the ones who we’ve brought into the world. My family has expanded, and I’m deeply moved by that today.

To those who’ve adopted children (aka Dana and Mike; Megan etc) – kudos. Oh what a gift He’s given you, and how blessed are your children!!! Adoptees are chosen and received – spiritually or naturally – whether they be big brothers, little sisters, mommas or pappas or sons and daughter; and the cords of love are just as real and can be just as strong.

And WE Beloved – through a choice made in Heaven and carried out on earth – have been adopted even by the Father who created us in the first place – that we might become sons (and daughters) for all eternity. And His love it true, strong, unending, and soooo massive and immeasurable that it’s incomprehensible in our human understanding – but it’s real and its forever.